Pine Rat - Scenes 7-20

INT. DOWNTOWN BOSTON BAR - NIGHT
[Jack, Billy, SETH, and their friend JOSE are sitting at a bar. They drain what’s left of their drinks then stagger to their feet]

BILLY: All right boys, I think I’ve gotta take a piss.
JOSE: Me, too.

[Billy and Jose stumble away. Seth and Jack are left alone. There is a bit of uneasy silence. Seth looks at Jack.]

SETH: Do you cut your nose hairs?
JACK: What? (pause) Are you saying I need to cut my nose hairs?
SETH: No. Actually I asked because I don’t see any.
JACK: Oh, yeah, I do.
SETH: How do you do it?
JACK: I use scissors now, but I used to use a nose hair trimmer.
SETH: You got something just to cut your nose hairs?
JACK: No, it was an attachment on my beard and mustache trimmer, but the battery died.
SETH: Why don’t you just recharge it?
JACK: It’s not that, the battery is just completely dead.
SETH: Oh. So do you use those little nose hair scissors?
JACK: No, I had to use like a regular pair.
SETH: Aren’t those kind of big?
JACK: Yeah. Actually the last time I trimmed them, I cut my nose a little bit on the inside.
SETH: Oh. That sucks.

[Billy and Jose come back out of the bathroom.]

BILLY: All right, guys, let’s go

[They leave the bar]

EXT. TREMONT ST. ADJACENT TO COMMON - CONTINUOUS
[Jack, Billy, Seth and their friend Jose stagger drunkenly out of a bar on Tremont St. They cross the street and start walking along the sidewalk next to the Common towards Park St. Everyone but Jose is laughing.]

JOSE: (shaking his head) Fuck! I need to take a piss.
SETH: Dude, you just took a piss.
JOSE: Yeah, but I have to go again.
SETH: Dude.
JOSE: Whatever.
SETH: There are plenty of trees right over there.

[Seth gestures to a poorly lit, heavily wooded part of the common (which clearly does not exist in the real Common). The wind shakes the leaves ominously.]

JOSE: I don’t know, I could just go back to the bar.
SETH: Wow
JOSE: Fine, I’ll piss in the trees. Nobody better see me though.
SETH: Don’t worry, there’s nothing to worry about.
JOSE: Whatever.

EXT. BOSTON COMMON - CONTINUOUS
[Jose enters the common alone through a gate in the fence. While his friends wait on the sidewalk, he makes his way deep into a deserted corner of the common. As it gets darker and farther away from the street, he starts to hear rustling noises in the trees around him. He stops and the sounds stop. He starts walking and the sounds start up again. This time, there may be something moving in branches of the trees. Jose stops again and again the sounds stop. He shakes the sounds off and finally finds himself in a secluded grove of trees. He stops in front of a tree that has a branch at about his eye level. He looks down, unzips, whips out, and starts to piss for an abnormally long time. When he looks up, he is eye to eye with an adorable black squirrel. Jose jumps back a step and pisses all over himself. Jose looks down, shakes himself off, and zips up.]

JOSE: You fucking scared me, little guy.

[The squirrel makes a cute chittering noise. Jose looks up.]

JOSE: So what are you doing tonight, Mr. Squirrel?

[The squirrel makes the noise again. This time it is answered by other squirrels. Dozens of squirrels reveal themselves, coming out of the shadows in the trees.

JOSE: (a little nervously) Oh, so you’ve got some friends.

[The squirrel chitters again, a little more aggressively and the other squirrels creep closer to Jose along the tree branches. Jose tries to back up, but stops when he hears more chittering from behind him. He turns around to face more squirrels.

JOSE: (more nervously) Easy there little guys. I didn’t know you were having a party. I’ll just be moving along now.

[The squirrels chitter together loudly and press even closer.]

JOSE: Okay, you’re creeping me out a little bit, squirrel dudes.

[Jose turns in another in another direction. More squirrels.]

JOSE: Hey. What’s going on?

[Jose turns to run. Before he takes a step, the squirrels fly out of the trees, leaping onto him. He screams, trying to fling them off, but only more come. One squirrel bites his shoulder and blood squirts everywhere. He stumbles, and falls out of sight, still screaming. Eventually his screams die out in gurgling blood noises and all that can be heard are the sounds of the squirrels chewing on his flesh.]

EXT. EDGE OF COMMON - CONTINUOUS
[Jack, Billy, and Seth hear Jose’s scream.]

SETH: What the hell was that?
JACK: We’d better go check it out.
BILLY: I don’t know…
SETH: Come on, you asshole.

[Jack grabs Billy’s arm and the three young men sprint into the common.]

EXT. COMMON - CONTINUOUS
[Jack, Billy, and Seth race into the park towards their friend’s scream. When they reach the grove of trees where Jose was attacked, they all pull up short and scream. The ground is covered in Jose’s blood and the squirrels are carrying off parts of Jose’s dismembered body, an arm here, a leg there, and finally his head. Jack stops and stares for a moment then Billy grabs his arm.]

BILLY: Come on man, we’ve got to get out of here.

[Jack hesitates, then takes off with Billy and Seth away from the carnage.]

SETH: What the fuck was that?
BILLY: We’ve got to find the cops.
JACK: Right.

[The young men keep running until they reach the edge of the common]

EXT. TREMONT ST. - CONTINUOUS
[Having escaped from the common, the young men spot OFFICER RAMIREZ standing near a cruiser. They run towards him.]

BILLY: (excited) Officer! You’ve got to help us. Something just happened to our friend, there was blood everywhere, it was horrible!
RAMIREZ: Slow down son, just tell me what happened.
BILLY: I don’t know. I think squirrels just ate our friend Jose.
RAMIREZ: Squirrels?
SETH: I swear to God, Officer, it’s the truth. We heard him scream, and by the time we got there, they’d torn him to pieces. You’ve got to believe us.
RAMIREZ: Squirrels? Have you boys been drinking? I think you’d better go before I throw you all in the drunk tank.
JACK: Just come with us and we’ll show you.
RAMIREZ: I’ve seen enough. I’m willing to bet it’s not just alcohol in your systems.
BILLY: The squirrels killed our friend!
SETH: You have to believe us!
RAMIREZ: I believe I’ve had enough of this bullshit.

[The officer reaches into the cruiser and pulls out his radio. He keys the mic.]

RAMIREZ: Unit 7403 to Base.
DISPATCHER: (o.s. over radio) Go ahead 7403.
RAMIREZ: I’m about to book three kids for disorderly conduct. I might need some back up. Could you send a cruiser to the corner of Tremont and Boylston?
DISPATCHER (radio): 10-4
RAMIREZ: 7403 out. (to kids) All right boys, you’re causing a disturbance here, I’m charging you with Drunken and Disorderly Conduct. 

[The boys stare on in disbelief.]

RAMIREZ: You have the right to remain silent...

[FADE OUT as Ramirez continues to reads the boys their rights.]

EXT. COMMON - NEXT MORNING
[McDermott steps from the sidewalk into the common. Walking farther into the common, he comes across a taped off crime scene at the site of Jose’s death. Brickowski and Morse are already on the scene, looking things over. Han Lo is hanging around in the shadows again. McDermott walks by a uniformed cop and ducks under the tape.]

MCDERMOTT: What have we got?
BRICKOWSKI: Nothing but oodles of blood and some urine. Guy must have got whacked while he was taking a piss.
MCDERMOTT: So basically, we know as much as we did yesterday.
MORSE: Looks like it.
MCDERMOTT: Any witnesses?
BRICKOWSKI: If there were, do you think I’d be stuck here fingering myself?

[McDermott shoots Brickowski a look of disgust and snorts.]

MCDERMOTT: Anything new turn up yesterday?
MORSE: No, but we got a preliminary report from the lab boys this morning. It was definitely human blood. Two types, AB positive and O negative. Two kinds of human hair, long blond and short brown, and a lot of animal hair. A couple of different kinds of dog, maybe a cat, and a shitload of squirrel fur.
BRICKOWSKI: Which tells us squat except that we have two dead people. We could have guessed that yesterday. And the hair tells us less. [Brickowski gestures around to the plentiful squirrels and people taking their dogs through the park.] It’s a fucking zoo in here.
MCDERMOTT: All right. Keep digging around the neighborhood... And try to keep it quiet. Three murders in two nights in the middle of the city... If the media gets a hold of this, it’ll be a shitstorm. Have somebody monitor the missing persons reports. I assume these poor bastards knew somebody. Then maybe we can at least get some faces to go with the blood. In the meantime, I need to go downtown and talk to the captain. We’ve had action the last two nights, no reason for our killer to stop there. I’ll get a few extra officers detailed to the common tonight. Call me if you need me.
BRICKOWSKI: Sure thing, boss.

[McDermott turns to leave, but sees Officer Ramirez walking quickly toward them.]

RAMIREZ: Lieutenant McDermott? I’m Officer Ramirez. I was told you’d be here. There’s something I have to tell you, sir.
MCDERMOTT: Well, spit it out, son.
RAMIREZ: Last night, I was on my downtown beat, when these three kids came running up to me. They were probably drunk, maybe on something else, but definitely wasted. And they told me that their friend got eaten by squirrels. 
MCDERMOTT: Squirrels?
RAMIREZ: That’s what I said. So I told them to shove off and stop wasting my time. But they kept at it so I had to throw them in the tank for the night. Then I heard about what had been found here this morning, and I figured that maybe something really had happened. I just thought you should know about it.
MCDERMOTT: Where are those kids now?
RAMIREZ: They’d have been let go this morning already, but we took down their information at the station. I can track them down for you.
MCDERMOTT: Good. You do that, and get back to Detective Brickowski here. He’ll tell you what you should do. Now scram. [Ramirez turns and rushes away. McDermott turns to Brickowski.] When he finds those kids, take them down to the station and get some statements from them. Hopefully now that they’ve sobered up, they’ll be able to tell us what really happened. If you need me, I’ll be in my office starting on the fucking paperwork.
BRICKOWSKI: All right.

[McDermott glances around and finally notices Han Lo.]

MCDERMOTT: Hey, wasn’t that Chinese guy hanging around yesterday, too?
BRICKOWSKI: (turning to look) Couldn’t tell you.
MORSE: (shrugs) No clue.
MCDERMOTT: Must be my imagination. When you turn something up, let me know.
BRICKOWSKI: Sure thing, boss.
MCDERMOTT: Later.

[McDermott turns and walks away from the scene back towards where he’d come from.]

EXT. BU CAMPUS - DAY
[Susan is walking through campus when Billy, Jack, and Seth all run up to her out of breath.]

SUSAN: Are you guys all right? Billy, I tried calling you all last night.
JACK: We just got out of jail.
SUSAN: What?
BILLY: Jose got killed last night.
SUSAN: Billy, that’s not funny.
BILLY: I’m sorry, Sue, but it’s true. We saw it. We told the cops, but they didn’t believe us, and they locked us up for the night.
SUSAN: (in disbelief) Wha... What happened?
BILLY: You wouldn’t believe it.
SUSAN: Just tell me.
BILLY: He... He got eaten by squirrels.
SUSAN: That’s impossible.
SETH: (freaking out) It’s true. He went to take a piss in the Common. We heard him scream, but by the time we got to him, they’d ripped him to pieces. There was nothing but blood and guts.
JACK: Those fuckin' squirrels, man. (shaking his head)
SETH: Goddamn fucking squirrels.

[Susan puts her hand over her mouth and starts to sob. She sits down on a nearby bench and Billy sits down next to her and puts an arm around her. Jack and Seth stand in awkward silence off to the side. Jack punches Seth in the arm.]

SETH: (rubbing his arm) Ow. What was that for?
JACK: “They’d ripped him to pieces, blood and guts?” That’s a nice way of breaking the news.
SETH: Sorry, man.
BILLY: Shut up, you two. (to Susan) It’ll be all right. There, there. There, there. (suddenly steely) We have to do something.
SUSAN: Well, my dad’s a cop.
BILLY: We know. That’s why we were looking for you. Maybe your dad will believe us. Can you talk to him for us?
SUSAN: Of course.
BILLY: Good, then... [Billy is interrupted as Officer Ramirez walks up to them.] (exasperated) What now?
RAMIREZ: It’s all right, boys. I just want to ask you some questions.
BILLY: Why, you won’t believe us.
RAMIREZ: Look, I don’t know about any squirrels, but something happened last night.
BILLY: How do you know? You didn’t believe that anything had happened before.
RAMIREZ: Look, we... we found something in the common this morning. We really shouldn’t talk about this here. Will you boys come with me down to the station?
BILLY: All right. (to Susan) Will you be all right?
SUSAN: (nodding) Yeah
BILLY: We’ll be back  as soon as we can. Will you still talk to your dad for us?
SUSAN: (nods again) Of course.
BILLY: All right, officer. Lead the way.

[Officer Ramirez leads the three boys away, and we are left with Susan alone on the bench, a look of steely determination growing on her face. She pulls out her cell phone and dials a number.]

INT. MCDERMOTT’S OFFICE. DOWNTOWN - CONTINUOUS

[McDermott is sitting behind his desk, going through paperwork when his phone rings. He picks it up and puts it to his ear.

MCDERMOTT: McDermott here.
SUSAN: (off screen) Hi dad, it’s me.
MCDERMOTT: What is it, pumpkin? I’m busy.
SUSAN: (o.s) Billy just told me that Jose got killed last night.
MCDERMOTT: What?
SUSAN: (o.s) Have you heard anything about it?
MCDERMOTT: I’ve been working on a case of my own. What happened?
SUSAN: (o.s) You’re not going to believe this, but Billy said Jose was eaten by squirrels on the common.
MCDERMOTT: (suddenly intent) On the common? Are you sure?
SUSAN: (o.s) I think so. We didn’t get to talk for long.
MCDERMOTT: Where’s Billy now?
SUSAN: (o.s) I don’t know. A police officer came and took Billy and Jack and Seth in for questioning.
MCDERMOTT: Holy shit.
SUSAN: (o.s) Dad? What is it?
MCDERMOTT: Don’t worry about it pumpkin, I’ll take care of it.
SUSAN: (o.s) Dad? Dad?

[McDermott ignores his daughter and hangs up the phone, staring straight ahead.]

INT. HOLDING ROOM DOWNTOWN - MINUTES LATER
[Billy, Jack, and Seth are sitting around a table in a windowless room. They are all looking down at the table and fidgeting, but no one says anything. After a few moments, the door to the room opens and McDermott strides in urgently. The boys look up at him.]

BILLY: Mr. McDermott! Thank God. I thought they were going to keep us here forever!
MCDERMOTT: Hello, Billy, (nodding to others) boys. I hear you saw something last night. You want to tell me about it?

[The boys all start chattering at the same time and McDermott sighs and pulls out a chair and sits down at the head of the table.

MCDERMOTT: So let me see if I’ve got this straight... Blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah.

[The boys look at McDermott]

MCDERMOTT: Well, all I just heard was a bunch of gibberish. Maybe if only one of you knuckleheads spoke at a time, I would understand what the fuck you were saying. So from the top. Billy, and only Billy, what happened last night?
BILLY: Jose got eaten by squirrels.
MCDERMOTT: (calmly) I’ll just call the animal control office and they can take care of it.
BILLY: What? Really?
MCDERMOTT: Sure, happens all the time... (raises voice) No! You want me to believe that your friend was eaten by squirrels?
Billy: (timid) Yes?
MCDERMOTT: All right, what were you boys on last night?
BILLY: We just had a little to drink.
MCDERMOTT: Drinking does not cause hallucinations in which you see your friends getting eaten by squirrels. Just tell me what you were on. I’m not going to charge you with anything. You’re in college, these things happen. But I need you to tell me what happened.
BILLY: We were just drinking. Honest, Mr. McDermott.
SETH: Yeah, if you don’t believe we saw anything last night, then why did that officer drag us down here?
MCDERMOTT: Oh, I believe you saw something last night. In the last two days, we’ve found the blood of at least three different people splattered all over the common like some sort of goddamn Pollack painting, so I know you saw something, but it sure as hell wasn’t killer squirrels.
BILLY: But...
MCDERMOTT: (threatening) If you try to tell me one more time that your friend was eaten by squirrels... Are you going to tell me that your friend was eaten by squirrels?
BILLY: (hanging his head) No, sir.
MCDERMOTT: Do any of you have anything to add? 

[All the boys shake their heads no. McDermott stands up.]

MCDERMOTT: No? Good. As it is, I’m going to have you all held as material witnesses until you remember what it is you really did see.
SETH: No fair!
MCDERMOTT: Well, I guess you’d better remember what happened last night. Otherwise, I’m going to hold you here as long as I legally can. And if you still don’t remember, I’ll charge you with something so I can hold you for even longer. Goodbye, gentlemen.

[The boys start all complaining at once, but McDermott ignores them, walks away, opens the door, steps through it, and shuts it behind him.]

INT. POLICE STATION JUST OUTSIDE HOLDING ROOM - CONTINOUS
[McDermott walks out of the holding room. Brickowski and Morse are waiting for him.]

BRICKOWSKI: Learn anything, Lieutenant?
MCDERMOTT: (shaking his head) They’re sticking with their squirrel story. I wish I knew what they really saw. Anyway, whoever’s really behind this has struck two nights in a row. Let’s not make it three. I want the Common blanketed with cops tonight. Understand?
BRICKOWSKI: Sure thing, Lieutenant.
MCDERMOTT: I mean, I don’t want anyone to be able to take a piss without hitting an Irishman.
MORSE: I’m half Irish.
MCDERMOTT: OK. So be half offended. Now get the fuck out of here.

[Brickowski and Morse each give a brief nod, then disappear. McDermott inhales deeply, then sighs. He shakes his head.]

MCDERMOTT: (whisper) Squirrels. Jesus Christ.

INT. BU SCIENCE BUILDING - THAT AFTERNOON
[Susan is sitting on a chair outside Von Reuling’s office. Von Reuling appears, key in hand, to open the door. Susan stands up.]

SUSAN: Professor!
VON REULING: Mizz McDermott, how may I help
SUSAN: Do you have a minute, professor?
VON REULING: Da, yes, please come inside.

[Von Reuling opens the door to his office and Susan follows him inside.]

INT. VON REULING’S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
[The office is cluttered, papers strewn everywhere, a large pile of them on the desk. Von Reuling drops his bag on the ground next to his desk and sits down.]

VON REULING: Please have a seat.

[Von Reuling gestures to the seat opposite his desk and Susan sits down]

VON REULING: What is it that I can do for you, my dear?
SUSAN: Professor, I was, um, fascinated with what you had to say about squirrels yesterday.
VON REULING: Really? No one has ever told me before zat zey find squirrels fascinating. Perhaps something else on your mind, da?
SUSAN: Well, it’s just that… some of my friends told me that they saw some squirrels exhibiting, uh, some very strange behavior last night.
VON REULING: Oh? What were our furry friends up to that was so strange?
SUSAN: (hesitant) Professor, have there ever been any reports of squirrels attacking people before?
VON REULING: Vell, surely, a rabid squirrel might very vell attack someone.
SUSAN: How about more than one squirrel at once?
VON REULING: Hmm. Not zat I have heard, but I do not think it likely. But... I must admit, squirrels are not exactly my specialty. Zere is someone I know who perhaps could help you more. His name is Remy Delhomme, and he made his living as a squirrel trapper in bayous of Louisiana before he moved here. Zere is not a man who knows more about ze behavior of squirrels than he. I could give you his phone number. If you have a tale of strange squirrel behavior, he’d love to hear it.

[Von Reuling rummages through his desk until he finds a small slip of paper. He hands it to Susan.]

VON REULING: Zere you are. However, I should warn you, Monsieur Delhomme is not ze most reputable of characters.
SUSAN: I’ll be careful. Thank you, Professor. You’ve been a big help.
VON REULING: Any time, my dear.

[Susan gets up and practically runs out of Von Reuling’s office.]

EXT. REMY DELHOMME’S APARTMENT BUILDING - EVENING
[Susan is standing outside REMY DELHOMME’S apartment building, a brownstone in the Back Bay. She walks up the steps to the front door and presses the buzzer for Apartment #3. The lock on the door can be heard releasing, and a voice comes over the speaker.]

REMY: (off screen, with static) Entrez, s’il vous plait.

[Susan opens the door and steps inside.]

INT. REMY’S APARTMENT BUILDING’S STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS
[Susan walks into the stairwell and climbs two flights of stairs to the third floor. She knocks on the door to apartment 3. The door opens. REMY DELHOMME stands there in his open robe, his undershirt and boxers can be seen underneath. He is in his early thirties. His hair is long and unkempt, and he hasn’t shaved in a week. He is smoking a long, thin, French cigarette with one hand, and holding a tumbler of bourbon with the other. He eyes Susan lecherously. Susan stands there stoically.]

REMY: Bonsoir, Mademoiselle. Bienvenue. Please come in.

[Remy gestures for Susan to enter. She eyes him suspiciously for a moment, but eventually she walks in the door.]

INT. REMY’S APARTMENT - CONTINUOUS
[Susan walks by Remy into the apartment. It’s a mess. Dirty clothes and empty liquor bottles dominate. Remy closes the door behind Susan].

REMY: Please forgive the decor. I do not get many visitors. Please have a seat.

[Remy sweeps the debris off a section of his sofa, and gestures for Susan to have a seat. She sits down reluctantly. Remy sits in a chair near the sofa.]

SUSAN: Um, thank you for seeing me on such short notice, Mr. Delhomme.
REMY: It’s nothing. And please call me Remy . I understand you have some questions about squirrels, non?
SUSAN: Yes, but if this is a bad time...
REMY: Non, non, non. This is nothing. So what did you want to know?
SUSAN: This may sound strange, but have you ever heard of squirrels attacking people?
REMY: Mmm. I take it you do not mean a little bite here and there?
SUSAN: Yeah, It’s just that my friends told me that they saw their friend Jose attacked and killed by squirrels last night.
REMY: (laughing) I think your friends were perhaps a little high, non?
SUSAN: (getting up) I knew you wouldn’t believe me.
REMY: (raising a hand) Non, non, non. Please stay. I laugh, but perhaps it is not for the reason you think, non? Please tell me more.
SUSAN: (sitting down) Well, my friends told me that Jose had to, uh, take care of his business in the Common. They heard him scream, but when they reached him, all they saw was squirrels dragging parts of him away.
REMY: (eyebrow raised) Vraiment? I have not heard of such things, and I have lived among squirrels all my life, but I have seen too many strange things on the bayou to not believe you. Normally squirrels are quite gentle, but when cornered they can be fierce warriors. I have seen their viciousness first hand and have the scars to prove it. But that has always been when they are cornered and alone. I have never heard of them acting together and so aggressively. If it is true, I would like to see it. And stop it. Do the authorities know of this?
SUSAN: My friends told the police, but the cops didn’t believe them. They are being held at the station right now for questioning.
REMY: I see. Then we will have to look into this ourselves, but I will need time to prepare. Can you meet me tomorrow at dusk at Park Street?
SUSAN: Sure, but don’t you think...
REMY: (rising) Do not worry. There is not a squirrel alive that is the match of Remy Delhomme. Are you with me?
SUSAN: I guess so.
REMY: Magnifique!